Marathon #2: The story of my race

It has been 4 years since I ran my first marathon. And shortly thereafter, I wasn't able to run for almost two years due to plantar fasciitis. I vividly remember thinking, I am not sure I will ever be able to run 6 miles again... let alone 26.2.

But time is an amazing thing, and at the beginning of quarantine, I found myself being able to add more miles. And then my friend Hannah talked about doing a training program ... and I wanted to work for something, so I signed on to run a marathon. At the time, I thought I would just bail if it got to be too much. But over time, I found myself devoting more time and energy to it - running longer than I thought I would, speed training, focusing on sleep... I was hooked.

To be honest, at the beginning of this race, I thought that I would run multiple more marathons after this one. The training had gone smoothly, much better than the first time around. I mean, for the first time, I actually had a race plan! But then came mile 18, and even with the endless hours of training and practice, it was just plain hard. It was painful. But no one can take that away from me - I did it.

I am a part of the 1 % (or possibly .5%) of the population that has achieved completing a marathon. And I've done it twice. What's not to celebrate in that? This blog is for me. To commemorate this accomplishment. Because for some reason, my human psyche wants to immediately move onto the next challenge - or to focus on what I didn't do; that I wasn't as fast as the others, or I wasn't a true "runner" like the others. The mind is freaking crazy.

I enjoyed the training. I enjoyed working toward something and I knew that I was as ready as I would ever be that morning. I want to remember that. I want to re-emphasize that for myself. Because it's easy to look to the next thing - the next challenge - it's easy to move on. And I'm so glad and so thankful for my friends and family who are holding this achievement up for what it is. It's bad ass. It's crown-worthy.

So here's the story of my race.

Short Story:

Wake up call at 3:45am, to be at the course by 5:25am, and started the race at 5:33am.

Headlamp, long-sleeve shirt, hydration belt stuffed with gels for the trip.

Finished 4 hours and 19 minutes later.

While true, that short version belittles the 5 months of training it took to get here, and the lifetime that passed while I ran for 4+ hours straight.

My plan:

1st mile: 10:20/mi

2nd mile: 10:00/mi

3 - 16 miles: 9:40/mi

And the naive me believed I could go faster after that.

This was an out and back course - 2 miles one way, and 2 miles back - repeated 6.5 times. The good news is that it was generally flat.

Nailed the first two miles, and hit my paces for the most part. My GPS was a little wonky with the terrain, but I felt good through mile 16. When you train at a minute and a half slower than your Marathon Pace, I had expected to feel like I was settling in or cruising for those 16 miles. It quickly became apparent to me that no, there really isn't any settling in, and yes it would feel like a race, the entire damn time. So when I got through 16 and then 17, I was holding steady. At 18 I really started to struggle - happened to pass Dave again at that point, and mentally wanted to stop - even expressed that out loud. But as you do, I kept going.

I had trouble nailing 9:40 and I was even having a hard time keeping it under 10:00/mi. It felt like my legs were the main issue, but I just couldn't go faster - things hurt. It was also hard the whole time to keep accurate track of my pace. My Garmin was saying one thing, the Race Joy (which was kicking out updates to my family and friends) was reading slightly slower, and then there was race markers. None of it quite aligning.

Oh yeah, and my hydration belt annoyed me the entire damn time. I must not have worn the combination of that belt and the pants I raced in. It kept riding up, unlike it had before, so I tied my long-sleeve around the band to occupy some of the space. I couldn't give it up because it was carrying my phone which was doing some of that tracking and I wanted the water with me. To boot, I ended up with a bruise on my back where the water bottle kept bouncing on the metal zipper :/

Speaking of which, a marathon abuses you in so many ways. The pain is real. The chafe is real. Clothing in general can be the absolute worst when it's rubbing against you for 26.2 miles. I can't know what it's like for men, but for women, or at least for me - let's just say that I am ready to start my own sports bra company (let's go buddy @jsewell!). So many dollars and new sports bras later, I still got ravaged by the end. (And yes, the post-race shower was brutal!)

My sister-in-law (who had just completed another marathon last month) sent me some quotes during my race. I wasn't able to see them until the end, but they allude to the massive physical and mental challenge of the race, and they make me tear up even now:

"There is no luck involved in finishing the Marathon, the ingredients required to tackle this formidable. challenge are straightforward: commitment, sacrifice, grit, and raw determination. Plain and simple.

The Marathon rattles you to the core. It deconstructs your very essence, stripping away all your protective barriers and exposing your inner soul. When you are at your most vulnerable, the Marathon shows no pity. The Marathon tells you that it will hurt you, that it will leave you demoralized and defeated, crushed in a lifeless heap alongside the roadside. The Marathon tells you you can't do it. 'Ha!' it torments you, 'in your dreams...'

You fight back, however, and stand courageously at that starting line. Courage comes in many forms. Today YOU have had the courage to keep trying and not give up.

You have done what few will ever do - and it is the most glorious, unforgettable awakening ever."

I believe these are pulled from a piece featured in Runners World written by Dean Karnazes, titled "The Marathon".

At the end of the race, I had almost caught up to Hannah, and I had given anything I had in those last two miles that hopefully qualifies as an extra boost :) How apropos that one of the last songs to come on my play list was "Til I Collapse" by Eminem. I know that one of my reactions to adrenaline is to become very emotional - so crossing the finish line I was barely holding it together. I was crying, and apparently I was also out of wind, so I actually found it hard to breathe. I had given so much effort that I could barely be me normal self. I could barely move, I was happy, but I almost couldn't think about anything else other than how cold it was and how much it hurt to move.

I commend the other runners that day. Some made it look easy. I really appreciated those that smiled as we passed each other. And I found myself cheering for them all. To my friends Hannah and Michael that completed their first one, you guys killed it, and I'm inspired by you.

It's overwhelming to me the care, love, and support I felt from my friends and family. So yes I was totally depleted and overwhelmed by emotion, but post-race I was overcome that day multiple times connecting with others through their achievements, their experiences, and their love for me.

Special thank you to Dave - who was up bright and early and at the start line with me. Sat in the dark trying to do homework, just to see me every 25 minutes or so. Brought Fifa back and managed her chaos to cheer me on. Dialed into his class from his phone just to show me what love is. He has been a cheerleader this whole time - checking my doubts, reminding me of the accomplishments along the way - helping me to see that I can achieve anything I set out to do. Helping me to be the best version of me - I couldn't ask for more.

So thankful, so humbled. And despite the physical pain I felt... so full of life.

"You are, above all, a Marathoner, and you will wear this distinction not on the medal they place around your neck, but deep inside your heart, for the rest of your God given years. Nothing can ever take that away from you. You are a Marathoner."

For fun, here's my Marathon Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/70mgY6AjjRWwWH4WNbcQOj?si=NZIGCiafTJOEph5l6YZkoA